“Let me get this straight: she stole your car, you want to go after her, and you want my truck?”“That’s right,” I nodded. “Where are your keys?”
“Umm, no. You’re not using my truck.”“Why not?”
“Why not? Because I don’t want you driving over there.”“How exactly am I supposed to get my car back?”
“Maybe you should’ve thought of that before you left your keys in the ignition.”“They weren’t in the ignition, they were in the keyhole of the trunk.”
“Okay, whatever. So, let’s say, hypothetically, I loan you the truck, you find her, and then you get the car back …”“Yay! That’s the plan!”
“How are you going to drive two vehicles home?”“Wait—what?”
“You drive the truck to Target, you find her, you get the car, how are you going to drive the car and the truck?”“Oh. I guess I didn’t think of that. All right, Plan B. You drive me over there, I track her down, and then I drive the car home and you drive the truck.”
“I don’t feel like spending my entire evening chasing Muse around Target, and with both kids, no less. And how do you even know that’s where she went?”“I don’t. But my friend Andrea said …”
“Forget it.” He walked out of the room.This had happened once or twice in our decade-long marriage: we had disagreed. I did what anyone would do in my shoes. I walked over to 7-11 to buy some M&Ms for renewed strength and emergency sustenance.
I was just about to complain to the manager that they were out of Peanut M&Ms when I happened to catch a glimpse of her out of the corner of my non-mascared eye.
“Muse! What are you doing here?!”
She was holding the last King Size bag of Peanut M&Ms. She shrugged and responded predictably, “I needed some chocolate.”“Where’s my car, Muse?”
“It’s out front. Here, here are the keys.” She handed them to me. They felt cold.I went over to the front plate glass window to see if my car was there or if she was lying. My car was there, and it looked like she’d even had it washed and waxed. That was unexpected.
I turned back to face her. “Thanks, Muse, thanks for getting my car washed.”“Excuse me?” replied the 7-11 manager.
“Oh, I’m sorry, I was talking to my friend.”
“Your friend?”I looked around. The place was empty. And she’d taken the M&Ms.