“You know what I hate?” asked Very rhetorically, “I hate when you say you are very, very tired. Well, guess what—I am tired from being used twice in a row when once is fine!”
Just lately, Very had been known to be very dramatic. “And another thing,” he was on a roll now, nothing would stop him, “sometimes I am just not the right word! Don’t get lazy and just grab at me when you know the word you really want is an extreme adjective and not just an intensifier or qualifier.”
I had no idea what he was talking about, but I could see he was getting very upset.
“Please, Very, come on, sit down over here,” I pointed to a very comfortable couch, which I knew he would deem just too squishy. “Sounds like you’ve had a rough time lately, what with being overused and all. Maybe you could just use a very cold drink?”
“NO. That is exactly what I am talking about. I don’t want a very cold drink, I want a refreshing drink or an icy-cold drink. You’re just wasting my time.”
I stifled a very small laugh.
Very started to cry. I’d never seen this side of him. “Just stop using me! Why can’t I ever catch a break? Make someone else do some extra work for a change! Just leave me alone!”
I leaned in to give him a very sympathetic hug, but just then, our good friend, Just, walked in.
“Talk about overuse,” said Just, just picking up the last words of our conversation, “you have no idea.”
MOV (“Manipulating Obstinate Very”)
I just can't understand why some words are so very overused. (I love when you personify words. It always makes the word geek in me giggle. Oh, and "always" is one of my overused words. And also sentences that start with "and".)
ReplyDeleteHa! see now my 'Very' is my biggest critic. It tells me; "extremely", "terribly", "outstandingly", Seriously woman, who do you think you're fooling? It's very clear that your vocabulary doesn't naturally move beyond 'kind of' ; )
ReplyDeleteI am prone to an appropriately placed paced well spaced "very very" every once in awhile. (Notice how very was sneaky and showed up disguised as an "every"?)
ReplyDeleteHow very Virgo!
ReplyDeleteJust a minute now, Pearl. This was a very, very, very, and very funny post, but not necessarily in that order. We wouldn't want to show any favouritism, would we? Just sayin'.....":) ~R
ReplyDeleteVery, very, very awesome post!! (and very creative too!!) :D
ReplyDeleteVery nice. :)
ReplyDeletehaha This made made me laugh... Thanks! :) *off to edit some words out*
ReplyDeleteJo
In Which We Start Anew
Extreme adjectives? Intensifiers? Qualifiers? You lost me at very. Great Post
ReplyDeleteTate's Other Side
Very, very funny. Just great! ;-)
ReplyDeleteI love this! Although for me, it's "really" that gets overused! Makes me laugh when I ask my class "oh, but whats a better word than (for example) good?" and instead of any of the exciting things I want them to say I get "very very very good"!
ReplyDeleteIf you vary very, then you'll find that very varies
ReplyDeletelove it VERY much :)
ReplyDelete