So it should
come as no surprise that I have started waving to people I do not know.
This
morning, I was walking out of Starbucks and noticed a middle-aged businessman
staring at me. He was smiling and holding
a bag of groceries. The way he was
looking at me was like, “Hey, you are good friends with my wife! From carpool!
Are you going to completely ignore me now?” So I did what I always do in a situation
where I think I know one thing and am totally wrong: I waved, said hello, then offered him a sip
of my coffee.
Upon opening
my mouth, I could see that he was not looking at me after all, but actually at
the sign behind me (“Try our new cinnamon latte!”). I ducked my head down and pretended that I
was not talking to him either, but instead to the person behind him (a homeless
man with no teeth).
Since
homeless people with no teeth are usually crazy, my new best friend was more
than happy to have a sip of my coffee as well as the rest of my bagel.
MOV
Oh I have definitely done that. In fact, I actually honked my car horn and waved like a fool at someone I assumed was a friend only to learn that it was a stranger. Ack. At least I could just drive away and leave the other person completely confused.
ReplyDeleteHaha! I do that all the time. So embarrassing.
ReplyDeleteOh MOV, I am in stitches! I wonder what Muse would have done? Oh yeah, she looks like a starlet. He definitely would have been staring at *her*!
ReplyDeleteAh, Muse! She needs a post sometime soon, eh?
DeleteDefinitely, we all get concerned for her safety if we don't hear how she is doing!
DeleteI have very poor eye-sight and know just about everyone in my neighborhood. I have come to the conclusion it's just safer to wave and smile and say hi to all the cars that pass by my house. Saves me a lot of trouble.
ReplyDeleteI've said hello to a mannequin before. It's because I thought it said hello to me.
ReplyDeleteYes, but have you apologized to a mannequin for bumping into it?
DeleteI must have one of those faces too. I've had people say I look like someone they know. I should ask, "Is it someone you like?"
ReplyDeleteI, too, misinterpret others stares or smiles and think they're directed my way. Then I pretend I'm waving at someone else. But I've never shared my coffee with a homeless man. I think I would just give it to him.
I had a man chase me down in the street, and breathlessly grab my arm, "Sarah! Didn't you hear me?"
ReplyDeleteI looked at him, "My name isn't Sarah."
His face flushed, "What are you playing at? And what did you do to your hair?"
"My name is Leauxra, and stop touching me."
Another time a guy I knew told me he didn't know I was in porn. What? Apparently, I have one of those faces, too. On the plus side, at one point, someone actually thought I was Gina Davis, so it isn't all bad.
OMG, love this!!!!!
DeleteSo you're telling me that all I have to do to get free coffee and bagels is find some stranger that has them and then pretend I know them?
ReplyDeleteIf I am the stranger, then apparently: yes.
DeleteOh dear! Ha ha. I love a post that makes me chuckle. :) xx
ReplyDeleteI am so glad the internet exists, purely because it allowed me to read this.
ReplyDeleteWho do people think I am? A long time ago someone said I looked just like Janis Joplin, but I don't think I've been mistaken for anyone except Janie.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Lola
I did that to someone at the mall once. I thought it was someone I went to school with, but after the third no, I felt utterly embarassed.
ReplyDeleteGreat post!
I am embarrassed for you. Sometimes, I see my mother in other people, and I start talking to who I think is her in Spanish. There's really no saving myself from that.
ReplyDeleteI am always mistaken for someone's teacher, not the nursing students I have actually taught through the years but an elementary school teacher. I always get "Hi! Do you remember me, you taught my son a couple years ago in third grade." Now in reality, I am the last person in the world you would want to teach your small children, I don't like small children and fear that at the end of the day every parent would find their children hanging from a clothesline I would have installed in the classroom to keep them out of my way. The ones that got away would be wandering the streets because I didn't even notice or care they were gone.
ReplyDeletehaha this story has made my day. Do what I do when at starbucks. When asked for a name for your order to be put on your cup I always take on a new persona. With that being said I just might be someone that someone knows.
ReplyDelete