“Wait, what do you mean a ‘B’ list?”“You know, if the main people you are inviting can’t come, then you have extra people on a secondary list … people that you like, but not necessarily your first choice.”
I was really puzzled by this, because in my mind, everyone I wanted to invite was my “A” list—there was no secondary list. In fact, if pressed, the only people we didn’t really need at the wedding would be the guests my fiancé wanted to invite. I guess those were the “B” list people.Not surprisingly, my fiancé was not real pleased to hear about that.
“What do you mean, ‘B’ list?”Anyway, we somehow worked it all out without an “A” or “B” list after all. We invited everyone we wanted, and did not worry too much about who could not attend.
Fast forward 13 years and I find myself again in this conundrum with my own children. But instead of me deciding who is on the “B” list, I learn that I am the one on the “B” list. My kids have no desire to spend time with good ol’ mom if there exists someone born between 2001 and 2008 within a half mile radius.Gone are the days when separation anxiety gripped my toddler like a tube of toothpaste being squeezed down the middle. Goes are the days when my preschooler Velcro-ed himself to my leg every morning at drop-off. Gone are the days when my kindergartner ran toward me with open arms after getting off the school bus, like a commercial for a cheesy Lifetime movie about a custody battle.
I now fall squarely in the category of “people you like, but not necessarily your first choice.”The other day, I made the mistake of giving my sons the option of getting out of school early to take me to the airport or they could go to a full day of school and have a playdate with a neighbor friend.
Guess which one they chose?I, of course, was devastated. I confided my situation to The Husband later that evening.
“Sweetie, I am not longer on the ‘A’ list,” I lamented.He smiled and said something he thought might be reassuring, “Oh, MOV, don’t worry … you never were.”