MOVarazzi

Friday, March 22, 2013

921. Anti-Bucket List

Since my mom died of cancer a few months ago, I have been thinking a lot about life and death.  I wonder if she accomplished everything she wanted to.  She flew to Paris and climbed the Eiffel Tower.  She went on a much-anticipated cruise to Mexico.  She went parasailing in Hawaii.       

But what things did she not get to do?  What items were left unfinished on her list?    
I started contemplating my own personal bucket list of items to do before I die.  As much as I would like to be the type of person who says “Photograph cheetahs in their natural habitat in Africa” or the slightly less attainable “Bake the perfect souffl√©,” I am learning there are actually more things I would rather not do—the anti-bucket list, if you will. 

MOV’s List of Things to NOT Do (Even Though It Would Impress Lots of People):
*Run a marathon
*Climb Mt. Kilimanjaro
*Eat a bug (intentionally)
*Hike the Appalachian Trail
*Ski a triple black diamond slope
*Skydive (people are supposed to stay in planes, not out of them)
*Swim with sharks
*Bungee jump
*Wrestle an alligator
*Rock climb


So, as you can see, I am actually the most boring person in the world. 
My list has more, ahem, achievable goals on it.  Things like: 

*Remember how to spell “recommend” or “vacuum” without having to use spellcheck or auto-correct
*Put gas in the car before the orange “Empty” light blinks on
*Remember to switch the laundry to the dryer on the same day it was originally washed (or at bare minimum the same week)
*Use my high school Spanish for something more exciting than ordering tacos
*Find the perfect couch (oops, I mean affordable perfect couch)
*Finish the stack of half-read books I have, or if not, then donate them to the Goodwill
*Buy new printer ink before I need it at 11 pm on a Sunday
*Teach my children not to punch each other (who am I kidding—I said achievable goals)
*Take my Target coupons with me instead of leaving them on the kitchen counter
You might not run into me on that flight to Brazil to climb Sugarloaf, but I am confident that I will one day remember to put the Target coupons in my purse.  It’s all a matter of priorities.      

MOV

34 comments:

  1. I thought I was the only one who had to look up "vacuum" EVERY time.

    I like your list & find it rather admirable.

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    1. thanks! I try to remember how to spell the word "vacuum" because you vacuum up crumbs and "crumbs" has only one "c" in it. :)

      It also has only one "u" in it. Nevermind.

      Delete
  2. I seem to be slowly moving my kitchen counter into my purse so that I am never without that important scrap of paper/coupon/grocery list/receipt/gift card. It is a very attractive mess that I pull out at the register! Good luck MOV!

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    1. Portable kitchen counter? something we all need! at least we would not forget anything, right?

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  3. I've been thinking a lot about my life since my Dad died, too. It's stirred up quite a bit of restlessness in me. I'm not entirely certain what do to with all of it, but I'll figure it out. Like you, I have no desire to jump out of a plane or wrestle a gator. I do, however, have a friend who climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro last year. Amazing! Her stories were enough to keep me from stepping anywhere near -- although she had a truly life-changing and marvelous experience.

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    1. Wow. People that climb Mt Kilimanjaro are brave.

      People who stay home and watch tv like me are ... smart.

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  4. On my bucket list is learning how to plug something into an electrical socket with the lights off. That's a bloody hard thing to master!

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  5. At my age thinking about death is a regular thing. The preparing for it, financially planning for it...UGH!!!

    I don't have a bucket list as it would just disappoint me that I failed at my last ditch effort things. I think I would have a better chance at rock climbing or eating a bug over anything on your doable list. Most of your doable is out of my capacity to accomplish.

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    1. I guess the way I live my life is not with a bucket list but more with a "right now" list. I had an idea to take my essays and make a book, and I did it. It was never a bucket list item per se, but it was an idea that I followed thru with and made into a reality. Maybe instead of a bucket list, I need a "drop-by-drop" list, like adding drops of rain into your bucket as you go. My book was a drop of rain. On to the next one! (not book, drop of rain-- I am currently getting my real estate license, so that is the next drop of rain)

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  6. I completely down with your anti-bucket list. No interest. On the other hand, I'm just trying to stay out of trouble and accomplish the simple things, like you.

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    1. stay out of trouble-- wish we could all do that! the trouble I find myself in is that I sometimes say whatever pops into my head without really thinking about the reaction first. yikes. gotta work on that.

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  7. I love the realistic bucket list.

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    1. thanks! we cannot all go jumping out of airplanes...... and as a former flight attendant, that might have made my passengers nervous.

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  8. I wrote a post not too long ago about the things I'm afraid I won't accomplish before I die. It really bugs me that I'll have unread books on my shelves and unwatched movies in my Netflix queue.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. ha! unwatched movies and unread books. how can we find time for everything we want to learn?

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  9. I don't fancy anything on that anti list either.

    I suspect may people's list contains things they feel they should want to do as well as things they really aspire to. If they really want to do those challenging things and go to those remote places why do they watch TV all evening and book hotel holidays?

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    1. oooooooh, that reminds me, I need to book a hotel holiday.

      Delete
  10. I love this. I hate how people act like lives aren't complete if we haven't done risky acts like sky-diving or whatever it is they find "fun".

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    1. I have children now. The riskiest thing I do is accidentally give one a slightly bigger piece of cake than the other. We risk all kinds of drama and tears shortly thereafter.

      Delete
  11. The Target coupons would be the ridiculous for me. If they aren't stuffed in the purse the second I get them, they magically squirrel themselves away, to reappear about 2 months or so after they expire... I don't have a burning desire to do anything on the first list either. Especially the bug. Eeeeew.

    Cat

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    1. Cat, why do they reappear after they have expired? Doesn't expire mean dead? They should automatically disintegrate and put themselves in the trash when they expire.

      Delete
  12. It seems like your list of things not do all involve things that would prevent oneself from completing a bucket list. Because you would be dead.

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    1. Ha! you always get right to the heart of the matter, don't you Christian? too bad I don't live near you and your wife because my husband and I could totally hang out with you over a glass of wine and listen to you say funny things.

      Either that or we could stalk you and pretend we saw you on House Hunters.

      Delete
  13. I'm with you, love the anti-bucket list. I agree with lots of those, but I would love to go to Paris and see the Eiffel Tower,not climb it, fear of heights. I hope your Mom had a good life, and since I don't believe that death is the end, I imagine she's embarked on a new one. Teaching your kids not to punch -- well let's just say they do grow up and punching becomes something else you'd like them not to do! :)

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    1. I believe death is not the end (but it is a sort of deadline for this life! no pun intended). I think my mom had a good life, I do worry that fear held her back sometimes.

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  14. Wait - where did you get MY anti-bucket list?

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    1. ha! you did not know that I stole that, didja?

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  15. I kid you not, one of the items on my own bucket list was to an entire plate of IHOP's Cheezecake New York Style Pancakes after seeing a news story about how that meal was an entire DAYS worth of calories. My plan was to eat that thing and live off it for 24 hours. So one day my husband and I were out and about and I saw a sign for an IHOP and I said I'm doing it.

    I remember my husband eating his sandwich wordlessly watching me mow down these pancakes like they were going out of style. After I had eaten that entire thing, and informed him he wouldn't need to make dinner that night, he asked me if it was worth it.

    You know what? It totally was.

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    1. were you hungry the next day?

      I could do that with thin mint girl scout cookies, no problem.

      Delete
  16. I love this!!

    I need to make an anti-bucket list, too!

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When you write a comment, it makes me feel like I won the lottery or at the very least like I ate an ice-cream sundae. (This has nothing to do with the fact that I did just eat an ice-cream sundae.)