“Why did you send her here?” my sister whispered angrily into the phone. “She’s driving me insane.”
“I didn’t
send her, she said you invited her!”
“Why would I do that? All she does is bounce around the house like
she’s on crack or something and shout out ideas. Oakley!
You should invent a doorbell that when you ring it, it sounds like a dog
barking! You know, for little old ladies
that live by themselves. Or,
Oakley! What about a horn for the BACK
of your car, so if someone honks at you for no reason, you can honk back? And Oakley!
Can you build a washing machine that is ALSO a dryer all in one so that
people don’t have to move the clothes from one machine to another?”
“Those are
kinda some good ideas, you have to admit, I mean, especially the one about the washing
machine—”
“MOV,
no! Focus. She is here 24/7, in my face.” “How long has she been there?”
“She got here
this morning.”
“Well, then
that is not technically 24/7 because if she hasn’t even been there a day yet,
then—”
“That’s
beside the point. When will she leave? I can’t handle all her ideas, it’s like she
just wakes up thinking about stuff and wanting other people to do it.”
“Umm, that
is sort of what a Muse does, you know?”
“I don’t
know how you can take it.”
“Well, she’s
not here every day, she just shows up when she has something I should write
about, like the other day, she had this cool idea that I could write about what
if we all had to vote on our favorite type of chocolate, and then you had to
wear this tattoo proclaiming what type, and that is how people were grouped,
instead of Democrat and Republican, it would be milk chocolate and dark—”
“Gah, that’s
another thing! She is eating all my
chocolate! I just bought some from that
little European market I like, you know, the one up the street that I can bike
to—”
“Hey, that
reminds me, when are you and Muse going biking?” “Excuse me?”
“Muse said
you were going to bike across America together?”
“She
did? She told you that? Where does she come up with this stuff?! I never agreed to bike with her. I'll bet she doesn't even own a bike.”
(to be
continued …)
MOV
