MOVarazzi

Friday, April 5, 2013

929. E Is for Existentialism

Sometimes I wake up at 3 in the morning and I can’t get back to sleep.  I know what you are thinking:  Why didn’t she put this under “I Is for Insomnia”?  But it is not about the fact that I am awake, it is about the fact that I am alive in this world. 

The Big Picture questions grip me at 3 am.  Why are we here?  What comes after this?  The people that I loved that have died—my grandparents, my mom, my aunt—will I see them again?  Or is this all there is? 
I have faith, faith in a Power stronger than me, faith that everything will be okay. 

So I roll over to go back to sleep, comforted by my faith. 
And then I worry about my diet instead. 

MOV

34 comments:

  1. Funny, when I lie in bed trying to sleep at 3am, I usually just whine about not sleeping. Or go through conversations I had with people decades ago and think, "Why didn't I say that?"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This cracked me up because I can really relate to coming up with witty comebacks to conversations I had decades earlier!

      Delete
    2. I always think of the witty comebacks in the car when I am driving and cannot write them down......

      Delete
  2. Great time for soul searching. I hate waking up in the middle of the night but when it happens I get up and read something inspiring, like Edgar Cayce the Sleeping Prophet, or Conversations With God.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. that is smart, Vicki. You might be too smart to read my blog, or I might be too dumb to write stuff for you to read.

      Delete
    2. You wouldn't say that if you read my blogs:)

      Delete
  3. My 3 am's are more like "what was that pain or noise".

    ReplyDelete
  4. I woke up at 4 AM this morning thinking about my blog. Without leaving the bed or even opening my eyes, I decided to cut a specific sentence from today's post before posting it. Then I could finally go back to sleep.

    A-Z Challenge is taking its toll.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True!!! I think I might have to take the month of May off to recover.....

      Delete
  5. You're lucky to have your faith! Those 3 am moments are when I have my worst panic attacks.

    ReplyDelete
  6. interesting post

    xxx zari
    http://le-style-blog.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  7. What is it about 3am? I wake up at 3am all the time and think about the same things. I envy your faith too, but not the diet worries!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I would like my faith better during business hours...

      Delete
  8. Why is it I always seem to need the potty at 3 am? What is it about 3 am? WHY?!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know! I go before I go to bed, but it does not matter.

      Delete
  9. Whatever comforts you. I long ago gave up on trying to figure out why I am here. For me it all ends with death (no afterlife) and no meaning.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. you will change your mind when someone you love dies and then communicates with you ALL THE TIME. my mom's birthday was 1-17, and now that number is literally EVERYWHERE in my life. license plates, clocks, dry cleaner receipt, you name it. I am 100% certain she is communicating with me.

      Delete
  10. I only wake up that early to pee:P

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ha! I hope you can go back to sleep!

      Delete
  11. MOV, you were far too serious in this one. Please note that some of us require you to be hilarious on a daily basis. Or we will not further extrapolate what "MOV" stands for. You are hereby warned.

    ReplyDelete
  12. When I wake up at 3:00 AM I start thinking to myself:

    Don't think about anything. You won't be able to go back to sleep.
    Don't think about anything. You won't be able to go back to sleep.
    Don't think about anything. You won't be able to go back to sleep.

    Then I realize I can't go back to sleep because I'm thinking about this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. is that when you watch old episodes of House Hunters and plan on stalking your neighbors?????

      Delete
  13. I had this happen the other night. I tried to take a shower to relax. Ended up flooding the apartment below. Never fun. Hopefully you figured out your diet though :)
    Elliot
    We Are Adventure

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ha! but at least you were clean then, and relaxed?

      Delete
  14. My husband tells me that that is why I don't sleep. I think too much. He can lay down and be out like a light in a minute. I have to wind down and sometimes I keep waking up thing. Usually it's about bills or the unfairness of certain things.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I totally have to wind down. why is that?????

      Delete
  15. I know if something wakes me up than I am in the clutches of something big. But the middle of the night just isn't a great time to contemplate it.

    ReplyDelete

When you write a comment, it makes me feel like I won the lottery or at the very least like I ate an ice-cream sundae. (This has nothing to do with the fact that I did just eat an ice-cream sundae.)