MOVarazzi

Thursday, February 16, 2012

669. Evil Girl Scout Cookies

As you may remember, Tall was very sick the other day. Now it was my turn. What was it with our family? Tall, sweet innocent second-grader, eats some tainted thing at a restaurant, and WHAM—throwing up all night. Me, sweet innocent mommy, eats two boxes of Girl Scout cookies, and WHAM—my tummy feels icky.

Why? Whhhhhhhyyyyyyyy? Do you think maybe the Girl Scout cookies were tainted? That was my first thought too, after I bit into the first sleeve of minty goodness, I remember thinking, These cookies taste fantastic! and then a little while later, I remember thinking, We did not buy enough boxes to get us through next week.

I typed an emergency email to my friend Angela, whose daughter had sold us the cookies in the first place. She had accused me lately of making my emails way too short. I think she was taking it personally. My emails with her were usually about logistics: “Still on for Thursday?” or “Will pick up kids at 8:20” or “Yes—can feed your cat this weekend.” I knew she would get mad if this email was what she considered too blunt, so I tried to write in complete sentences:

“Dear Angela,

How are you?

Any more Girl Scout cookies left to sell? Please drop off 15 boxes.

Best,
MOV”

Angela has an iPhone, so she emailed back right away:

“MOV,

So so so sweet of you to offer to sell some cookies for Mai-Lin! She would be thrilled! But, honestly, it is not necessary. We absolutely cannot accept your generosity to sell extra boxes for us (plus I think it is against the Girl Scout rules). Thank you though!

—Angela”

She had completely misunderstood my email. I did not want to sell 15 boxes; I wanted to buy 15 boxes. Now I was embarrassed. Plus my tummy felt sick.

So, this story does not have much of a point, I guess, unless it is as a cautionary tale, to let you know to avoid Thin Mints. Next time, I’ll buy Samoas.

MOV

24 comments:

  1. You might want to try a Tagalong chaser with those Samoas!

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  2. Drats! I was saving a future blog about my love of Thin Mints and now you've gone and stolen my thunder! But if Mai-Lin does have any more to sell, we depleted our 20 box This Mint order in 48 hours. S.O.S.

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  3. Ooops. Meant THIN Mint. Fast typist. Not very accurate.

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    1. I like This Mint better, it's like-- hey, you can have THAT mint over there, but THIS mint, THIS one, is mine. Ha! (and I certainly don't *feel* thin after partaking of all those supposed "thin" mints anyway...)

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  4. Dang Girl Scouts and their boxes of deliciousness! What's a person to do?

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    1. I know, right? so not my fault. don't make the unicorns cry! or, what do I look like, a unicorn? (dang--I messed up the line already)

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    2. Don't treat me like a unicorn -- take that, you Girl Scouts!

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  5. It was probably the last one you ate that was tainted, too. They're sneaky like that.

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    1. I'm sure you're right. I just had another one (sleeve) to double-check that they are not ALL tainted. I do not want my poor family to get sick. (I am a giver like that.)

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  6. I did the same thing this week with the shortbreads. One is just NOT enough. A word of advice: tell her you're getting them for relatives. (Technically, you and The Husband and kids are "relatives." It's not even lying, really!)

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    1. three top cookie eaters in my household: Me, Myself, and I. (oh, and the Maid! forgot about her!)

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  7. HA HA HA! Love it. I do the exact some thing!!
    <a href="http://gigglelaughcry.blogspot.com>Giggle, Laugh, Cry</a>

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    1. so glad I am not alone in this addiction......... we need a support group, GS Cookie Gobblers Anonymous. We can meet at my house, 'cause I have Samoas.

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  8. Keebler has their own (and a bit cheaper than 4 dollars a box) version of Thin Mints and Samoas.Pretty tasty!
    Of course I still spend the 4 bucks, because everyone has a friend who has a daughter,and you can't deny them a sale, but for when you run out, those little Keebler elves are there to help.

    MOV I would let your tummy settle a bit from the cookie hangover. Although........... they say the cure for a hangover is more alcohol in the morning,Hair of the Dog! So maybe you should get your butt to the store (or to Mai-Lins house) and have some Hair of the Scout! Hair of the Elf? Hair of the Girl? Hair of the Minty Fabulousness????

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    Replies
    1. So funny you say this about Keebler. You know I was a flight attendant for a long time. Well, on one of my flights, I had this passenger with a Keebler logo on her polo shirt, so I made some (lame) joke about elves making her shirt, and then we got into this fascinating conversation (it was a cross-country flight, lots of time to kill) about who makes the Girl Scout cookies-- and it was her company! Keebler! She said that it was not public information really, but that is why they have the cheaper than $4 version.

      And so far, hair of the minty fabulousness is working well, thanks for the tip!

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  9. You get more cookies for your buck with Thin mints. There are only 15 Samoas per box. Freeze your Thin Mints. They freeze well. I know these things. I'm a lifetime member of Girl Scouts, freezing was a huge selling point for me when I was a Sr in High School.

    I have the same problem with Trefoils. Can eat 3 boxes in one sitting if my husband would let me.

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    1. oh, those dangerous frozen cookies. yum.

      by the way, checked out your blog. very cool.

      xxo
      MOV

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  10. Oh, the thin mints are amazing. So thankful to hear that I am not the only human vacuum for these things! Can't wait to hear about your new job!

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    1. human vacuum, that's a good way to put it. :)

      Now I am finding out that I need to get just 3 or 4 cookies out of the freezer at a time, then pour my glass of milk, and take my snack to the other room. THat way, when the cookies are devoured (5.3 seconds later, give or take), I at least have to do a little bit of exercise to deserve the next batch (the exercise is obviously walking back to the kitchen).

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  11. I was so mad at the cute little girl who came to my door and made me buy those nasty Thin Mints. Ate a sleeve last night. I keep them in the freezer. Down to 3 sleeves left.

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    1. yikes! might have to ration the rest, Gina!

      (and by the way, don't you just hate people that say IN THE MONTH OF JULY: "I just found 3 boxes of GS cookies in my freezer left over from February! I, like, totally forgot they were in there! Now we have enough to last us thru October." If anyone who reads my blog routinely says something like this, I am sorry that we can no longer be friends.)

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  12. Hey To all of you true mint thin chocolate lovers. It is 03/17/2012 7:06 in the morning an I can't sleep but I can lay here thinking of those smooth chocolate thin mint cookies that always leave 5 pounds behind,LOL to myself wishing I could have at least 1 but now thanks to my inter fat girl who secretly wish she could run to the store right now!!! Has found out all the thin mint information we need to know on how not to wish for just one,but now can't wait to have that I can't believe I just eat the whole sleeve look on are face!!! Heeeeey,heeeeey,giggle, giggle I so thankful love you thin mint true lovers!!!!!!

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  13. Oops I'm new at this just look at the time it says posted! Giggle,Giggle

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When you write a comment, it makes me feel like I won the lottery or at the very least like I ate an ice-cream sundae. (This has nothing to do with the fact that I did just eat an ice-cream sundae.)